For some, getting drunk with the lads is a monthly thing, for others it’s almost daily. I can guarantee everyone who has been drunk more than a few times has had their fair share of bad experiences, I’ve decided to count down the top 10 things we’ve all done whilst drunk
Table of Contents
- 10. Carried on drinking after being sick
- 9. Urinated in public
- 8. Knock on a mate’s house very early in the morning
- 7. Buy loads of food
- 6. Fall asleep in a weird position
- 5. Get lost
- 4. Lose precious items
- 3. Got off with someone way below your standards
- 2. Completely passed out
- 1. Started (or nearly started) a fight
10. Carried on drinking after being sick
It’s really disappointing when the night has just started but you’ve already had that many shots that you need to get it all out of your system. Fortunately though, it’s still too early to leave, the best thing to do is make space. It’s a very effective method of getting out of being called a lightweight by your mates, I’d put a bit of water before the being sick and the drinking again, though.
9. Urinated in public
During a heavy drinking session, you will find yourself going to the bathroom all of the time, but after the bars have shut and you’re on your way back there’s no bathrooms to visit. This is where street corners look very attractive, it’s worth spending a couple of seconds getting it out that it is walking 15 minutes back needing it badly. This is illegal though which is why you have to be sneaky.
8. Knock on a mate’s house very early in the morning
You have no money, have no way of getting home and need a place to relax for 15 minutes while you get your stuff together. Unless they live with strict parents, mate’s houses are perfect for this, have a sly brew and lend a few quid before you go on your way.
7. Buy loads of food
When the bouncers are kicking everyone out of the clubs, there are few things more beautiful than the sight of a kebab shop. It might just be me, but I tend to buy a lot more than I can eat. I say to myself, “I can eat a full 12″ pizza” or “You’ll demolish that doner kebab with large chips” but all that ends up happening is I have something to reheat in the morning.
6. Fall asleep in a weird position
When you’re tired, have a full belly and are incredibly drunk, anything is a bed. It’s hard when you have a load of people and everyone is hogging all of the covers/seats, but that bathtub will make a good mattress and that coat is a great pillow.
5. Get lost
This can happen for a number of reasons, but the most common is because you’re looking for your friends. You could have sworn they went this way until you realise you’re nowhere near where you should be. This usually requires bailing to the closest bus shelter but if you’re out of money, you’re out of luck (always have a plan).
4. Lose precious items
I constantly check my pockets all of the time for my valuables, if someone finds your wallet/phone etc on the floor they will take it and walk off. Things like Passports, Provisional driving licenses and phones are the most common to lose so make sure you’re checking your pockets often.
3. Got off with someone way below your standards
You may be thinking “I’ve never done this” but think deep down into the memories you’ve erased, you have. This usually doesn’t happen because there’s a lack of girls your standards, or because of you not being able to speak to girls, it more like you’re very drunk and your standards have gone out of the window. Your buddies may help and pull you away, or they might just let you do it and laugh at you for it.
2. Completely passed out
This is usually fine if it’s due to tiredness and you’re at a club because others will get you a taxi home, but at a house party you better hope you don’t pass out first. Being drawn on (especially with permanent marker) is hilarious to everyone but yourself, shaving eyebrows is even worse. You usually regret this in the morning in conjunction with a huge hangover.
1. Started (or nearly started) a fight
Undoubtedly the worst thing about getting drunk is the unnecessary violence that comes with it. A slight accidental nudge can feel like a full on punch when drunk and you can bet people react in that fashion. Some people who don’t like fighting tend to just defuse the situation but fail horribly and sometimes make it worse. At the end of the day, people need to realise that they go out and drink to have fun.
So there we have it, if you’ve really not done any of these then you need to get a few bottles of vodka this weekend.